February 3, 2015 6 Comments
There will be no gory photos in this story. Although many things went wrong, cutting myself was not one of them.
Don’t buy a cheap “as seen on TV” food chopper like the Vidalia Chop Wizard. If you did, don’t try to use it to cut a bunch of different foods that might not work. If you are doing that, don’t use the fine-dicing grid; use the bigger one that is less likely to get jammed up. If you must do this sort of experimentation, don’t do it when you don’t really have time for dinner to go spectacularly wrong and be delayed more than an hour while the whole family gets mad at you. Also, don’t do it when you already have a cut on your thumb from last week’s bagel-slicing mishap, because raw onion juice will sting, and the Band-aid will not protect you but will actually make it worse by holding the onion juice right there in the cut with that nice absorbent pad.
I made all of these mistakes on Sunday–except for buying the chopper in the first place, which I did a little over a year ago; it worked pretty well on onions, at first–and the whole mess resulted from one main Thing Not to Do: Don’t give up on using the kitchen tool that is really appropriate for the job because the baby is sleeping in the dining room. Move the baby to another room, or take the risk that the baby will wake up and need to be held by Daddy for a while but will then go to sleep for the night at a reasonable hour. If baby’s sleep is really so precious at this time that you can’t bear the possibility of disrupting this nap, change your dinner plan to something that doesn’t require chopping. Just, please, don’t put yourself through what I did! Read more of this post