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Robots!
A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 5
This dish, and some slices of skirt of vanilla sugar, are going to two hard-boiled eggs sprinkled with the size of flour; cook it all over to get cold. Beat the jelly with some chopped orange-peel, rub it strongly, plunge it in a good fire, and when it is cold, break into squares cut into a purée.
Joyous to the “Eyebrow”
I was recently given a gift, not because I need the tools enclosed but just so that I could admire the packaging. This is truly a startling example of the kind of thing you sometimes find on Earth that seems to be written in English but . . . isn't . . . quite. The … Continue reading Joyous to the “Eyebrow”
A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 4
See Chapter 1 for explanation of this unusual recipe collection. SPECULOOS: Add Brussels sprouts, not the bechamel sauce, and very little cayenne. Baste often with a few raisins or two dessertspoonfuls of an edge and dip them quickly with thick consistency in the flour you have sprinkled with vinegar. Then roll in sherry and a … Continue reading A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 4
A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 3
See Chapter 1 for explanation of this unusual recipe collection. HAM WITH EGGS: Take a few pickled walnuts, flattening through the mutton the same weight of buttered paper through a quart of herbs. In a Belgian manner, take the liquor; mix the pan, adding pepper torn apart from the paste and all the threads. Cut the … Continue reading A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 3
A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 2
See Chapter 1 for explanation of this unusual recipe collection. BELGIAN CARROTS: Cut your croquettes by the whole solar system to futurity, resolve into the different shapes, and cut in cold before serving it. Mix till it simmers in the breadcrumbs, grated cheese, sliced carrots, and chocolate for five minutes, while a few Brussels sprouts … Continue reading A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 2
A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 1
I decided that this text requires its own post to really do it justice. It started as an extremely lengthy spam email received by my ten-year-old Nicholas, who immediately turned it into a bizarre modern entertainment experience by having the computer read it aloud. Then he wanted to post it as a comment to one … Continue reading A Robot’s Cookbook, Chapter 1
Where Robots Learn to Cook
Recently I've had several conversations about robots: how people keep making robots that can do new things, how robots are getting better and better, how someday maybe they'll take over. Yes, it is a bit daunting, but I believe there are some things that robots will never be able to do quite as well as … Continue reading Where Robots Learn to Cook
When Robots Write About Grildebeest
Last month, I invented a new word for a future animal of my own imagining. Today, on an idle lunch-break whim, I did a Google search to see if anyone else has been talking about grildebeest yet . . . and I found that one of those wily robots has picked up the topic. Well, … Continue reading When Robots Write About Grildebeest
When Robots Write Novels in Your Comment Box
Mysterious robots sometimes comment on my articles. WordPress is much, much better at filtering spam than my old blog software, but it does sometimes put non-spam comments in the spam folder. That is where I found the text below, which I have edited a little bit to make it more entertaining, but I did not … Continue reading When Robots Write Novels in Your Comment Box
When Robots Comment on Your Blog
Sigh. First robots were writing news broadcasts and e-mailing them to me. Then robots started writing blogs and trackbacking to mine. Now robots are posting comments here. For example, here's one that just arrived, theoretically responding to my electric kettle article, from a robot named Woumesque: While a overwhelming seroquel 150mg to bottom of theyd … Continue reading When Robots Comment on Your Blog
When Robots Write the Blogs
Yesterday I delved into the settings for my blog software and decided to turn on an option to notify me of "trackbacks"--when other sites link to mine. I thought it would be cool to hear about them right away, instead of just discovering them when I poke around in the "statistics" to see how people … Continue reading When Robots Write the Blogs
When robots write the news
Lately, my e-mail account at work has been receiving a lot of spam that consists of a block of text, a pornographic image, an ad for some drug, and then another block of text. It's become a routine yet surreal part of my day, being bombarded with porn while I'm trying to do my job. … Continue reading When robots write the news
The Earthling's Handbook 